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- 18 September 2008
- No. 5,373 (cartoon)
- Will you ever abandon me?
Of course not.
We’ve never been together.
- 19 September 2008
- What’s Wrong With a Miniskirt?
- It’s a mistake to depreciate foreign cultures, but it’s a mistake that sometimes cannot be resisted. And that’s certainly the case with Uganda, a country about which I know virtually nothing.
What little I do know is associated with Idi Amin, the syphilitic, brutal tyrant who terrorized and almost destroyed the country decades ago. He was an appalling murderer and torturer, but he occasionally had a certain lunatic appeal, such as when he challenged the British navy to a battle on Lake Victoria.
Fortunately, today’s Ugandan bureaucrats aren’t in the same criminal league as Amin, but they still manifest a certain lunatic charm. Take Nsaba Buturo’s war on miniskirts.
“What’s wrong with a miniskirt?” Uganda’s Minister for Ethics and Integrity asked. “You can cause an accident because some of our people are weak mentally.”
Buturo views miniskirts as a severe traffic hazard, and worse.
“These days you hardly know who is a mother from a daughter, they are all naked. If you find a naked person, you begin to concentrate on the makeup of that person and yet you are driving,” he said.
I’d think that Ugandan drivers would face greater distractions than miniskirt-clad women of all ages, but, having never been to Uganda, I really can’t say.
- 20 September 2008
- A Legend in My Own Mind
- As a legend in my own mind, I dislike being compared to other artists. And so, I was mildly irritated when Veronica compared my work to someone else’s.
“Upon closer examination,” I said, “I believe you’ll discover that the similarities in our work are quite different.”
Veronica didn’t argue, and that’s never a good sign.
- 21 September 2008
- Love is Grand
- Brandon’s in love with Anita, and is not hesitant to tell everyone. At great length, even.
“The five things I love about her are her beauty, her brilliance, her charm, and her empathy,” Brandon enthused.
“So what’s the fifth thing?” I asked.
“It’s her brilliance,” Brandon exclaimed.
“You already mentioned brilliance,” I pointed out.
“I did, but she’s so brilliant it counts twice,” Brandon enthused.
Ah, love is grand!
- 22 September 2008
- Wasted Space
- Everyone’s whinging about how little money they have. Looking around, I see huge amounts of unused and unappreciated material wealth. Since I’m embarrassingly ignorant about economics, I’ve never been able to even begin to explain why I feel this way. Fortunately, Buckminster Fuller had no such deficiency.
Our beds are empty two-thirds of the time. Our living rooms are empty seven-eighths of the time. Our office buildings are empty one-half of the time. It’s time we gave this some thought.
- It is indeed time we give this some thought, but I doubt anyone will. Fuller died over twenty-five years ago.
- 23 September 2008
- Irish Breakfast Tea versus English Breakfast Tea
- Julia was mulling over her beverage options; she asked me what differentiated Irish breakfast tea from English breakfast tea.
“I think you’ll find that there’s no whisky in English breakfast tea,” I advised.
Julia opted for the Irish breakfast tea. Three cups, and perhaps a fourth.
- 24 September 2008
- Bob Dylan’s Missing Suitcase
- Bob Dylan Née Robert Zimmerman talked about having “been in trouble since I set my suitcase down” in his recently released song, “Mississippi.” Dylan’s one of the wealthiest people on the planet; I’d wager he hasn’t touched a suitcase in decades. Perhaps he’s telling the truth; one could argue that he really has been in trouble since he set his suitcase down.
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©2008 David Glenn Rinehart
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