2006 Notebook: Weak XLVII
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20 November 2006
No. 2,951 (cartoon)
Why are you looking at me in the mirror?

I can’t stand looking into your eyes.

21 November 2006
Old and Timeless
After dinner, Veronica played an old album by the Sex Pistols.

“I remember listening to this driving through southern France with my girlfriend twenty years ago,” I said, “and even then it was old.”

“No,” she corrected, “the music is timeless. On the other hand, you are certainly old.”

22 November 2006
Escaping Flint Redux
Brandon, one of the few people I still know from my childhood, returned to the wretched place where we were born: Flint, Michigan.

“Brandon,” I asked, “why did you move back to Flint? I thought you were so happy to escape.”

“Exactly,” Brandon replied.

“Exactly what?” I responded.

“I enjoyed leaving so much the first time,” Brandon explained, “I came back so I could do it again.”

I’m skeptical, but perhaps that’s because I’m a pragmatist. Or, at least I’m not a masochist.

23 November 2006
Reasons to Give Thanks
Today is Thanksgiving, perhaps my favorite holiday after April Fool’s Day.

Anita appreciates Thanksgiving, but mainly for the suicides in the newspaper.

“A Thanksgiving suicide is irreproachable,” Anita explained. “Surely there’s no more pure example of nothing to be thankful for than taking one’s own life on Thanksgiving.”

For me, though, I shall continue to celebrate the day for more nebulous reasons.

24 November 2006
Cartooning With Automatic Weapons
I read that a cartoonist with a machine gun burst into the offices of Miami Herald demanding to see the editor. No one wanted to talk with him except the police; Jose Varela was arrested without getting an audience.

The moral of the story is this: cartooning is tough, but editors are tougher.

25 November 2006
A Legend In My Own Mind
Julia asked me what she should do to improve her drawings.

“I’d consider lowering your expectations,” I advised. “That usually works for me.”

“Any other suggestions?” Julia asked skeptically.

“Well, then you might want to think about redefining success,” I suggested.

“Any more constructive ideas?” Julia continued.

“Maybe,” I replied, “although this is probably a corollary for the other suggestions. Try being a legend in your own mind; that approach has always worked for me.”

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©2006 David Glenn Rinehart